Trick or Treat

We survived a night of trick or treating with Maddy and the boys.  The candy selection isn't as good as it used to be.  :)

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Fall Fun

We've been working on crossing off things on our fall bucket list.  Earlier this month we made caramel apples.   My favorite!

The other night after I got home from work I raked up a small pile of leaves and set the boys free.  At first Owen wasn't the least bit interested.  He played on the swing by himself, but eventually joined the fun.  

Where is Brendan??

Five minutes of raking = hours of fun.  

Angry Birds Invasion

Last weekend was Brendan's big birthday bash.  

We were invaded by Angry Birds!  At Brendan's request.  

excuse the bluriness....not sure what happened

from Jossabean Sweets

After I whipped up the party decorations, I went all gourmet with the food.  What does a four year old love more than hot dogs, really?

This is the face you make when you're mortified by a group of people standing around singing to you.  It is a creepy concept, really.

Remembering our babies

"They say the inability to accept loss is a form of insanity.  It's probably true.  But sometimes it's the only way to stay alive."  Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

Noah Paul Weinshrott just a few days old

October 15th is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day.  It's a day I've heard about in the past but never gave it much thought.  This year it has a whole different meaning.  This week marked five months since Alicia & Kevin lost Noah.  It's funny that five months can seem like such a long time and the blink of an eye at the same time.  Noah should be celebrating his 10 month birthday on the 17th.  Instead we are remembering him on Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day.  That seems wrong in so many ways.  

In reading about Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day, I read about Wave of Light.  At 7 pm, all time zones, if everyone lights a candle and keeps it burning for at least one hour there will be a continuous wave of light over the entire world in loving memory of all babies.  So, if you think of it, light a candle.  

There is a blog that I have been following for quite some time.  It was a blog that was started shortly after a couple found out that their unborn baby had a heart defect.  Ewan was born last September but died three weeks later.  His mom, Kirsten, started "Say their Names" in honor of today.  People submitted the names of their babies that they lost.  Kirsten felt that it's important for parents to hear their babies name out loud.  Noah's name was submitted.  Click HERE to watch.  If you want to read more about Ewan, visit his blog at http://www.team-ewan.com/p/backstory.html   

I also read THIS article that I thought I'd share.  

Noah the day of his baptism

They say it's your birthday...

Guess who turned 4 today???  Yes, 4!

We asked him all week long what he wanted to do this week.  He said he wanted to go bowling.  Last night he said he wanted to go bowling then to the museum.  By this morning he had forgot about bowling.  

After he went to bed last night I decorated his bedroom.  The idea was that he would have to break out of the room, but apparently both him and Owen crawled under it because he thought it was too nice to break.  

We headed off to Madison for the day and started with lunch at Hu Hot.  Yep, he's as thrilled as he looks.   

Then headed to the Children's Museum for some fun.  He met a little boy that became his BFF for the day.  When I  asked Brendan what the boys name he said "I can't tell".  When I asked the little (Indian) boys name, I understood why Brendan couldn't tell.  They had a good time together, nameless, anyway.

He held a mouse.  He told me that he always wanted to hold a mouse on his birthday.

He used a magnifying glass to solve a mystery.  He found some very "suspicious" items in the garden.  

We finished the day with some BLUE red velvet cake.  He told me yesterday that he has wanted a blue cake his WHOLE life.  How can you say no to that?

Ray of Light

I have a hard time believing that Brendan is 4 years old!  It does not seem possible.  It seems like just yesterday April and I were sitting at the hospital waiting patiently for the arrival of our first born.  We did not tell anyone that April was in labor in an effort to quietly welcome our son into the world (plus we were afraid people would be waiting on pins and needles for what would likely be a lengthy process…and it was).  I had everything mapped out in my head.  Brendan would be born…I was NOT going to watch the actual birth.  We had the nursery ready and everything was in its place, so we were as prepared as we could be and I thought I was relatively calm and braced for what was to come.

Time went by slowly on that Saturday.  The nurse that kept checking on April was friendly…but the actual dilation process seemed to be taking an eternity.  It was mid-evening when we FINALLY got those lovely words that our baby was on the way.  April requested a mirror so she could watch and I positioned myself right by her side, but strategically placed so I did not have to watch the show.  Listening was good enough for me.  April pushed, and pushed AND pushed.  I was pretty laid back as I tried to cheer my wife on (probably too laid back).  I kept watching the doctor’s face waiting for a sign that he was almost here.  When she mentioned she could see his head…I felt a small jolt of excitement that” this was really happening”.  This excitement quickly changed to panic when I heard the heart monitor slowing down a bit and saw the look of concern shadow over the doctor’s face.  She said we needed to get him out now so April was really going to need to get this done.  The fear worked like jumper cables on my body and I immediately popped out of my chair and found myself at the doctor’s side watching intently and anxiously for Brendan to arrive.  I could see the very top of his head.  Instead of the horror and disgust I thought I would experience viewing this spectacle, I quickly transformed into mega-coach as I encouraged April to push with her might and get him out to safety.

With some immense effort on April’s part, I observed the birth of our son.  The doctor pulled Brendan out and I laid my eyes on our new baby boy for the very first time.  My boy has always made his presence known and this day was no different…Mr. Lee entered the world face up.  I was “prepared” for this, or so I thought.  There was nothing in the baby manuals that mentioned the intense rush of love that was going to wash over you when you see your child for the first time.  I have never felt anything like it in my entire life.  Time stood still as I just breathed in the sight of the most exquisite present I have ever received. Four years later…I can honestly say that I only love and adore him more.  

Brendan Anthony Edward Lee was born on October 13^th, 2007.  And I was officially a Dad!  The little man had a cone head, was chubby as could be and was sporting the trademark Brendan scowl.  He was perfect.  And the composed new parent lost his head.  I was not ready for the way I was going to feel and could not stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks.  I don’t cry often so this was a very huge moment for me.  He was so beautiful and this was REAL.  I cut the umbilical cord and shared the moment with April as she held her little boy for the very first time.  

The cone head was gone in no time and the family and friends all came to visit and welcome our precious little gift.  I have never been (at that time) more proud of anything or anyone in my entire life.  If I could do it all again, I would just try to pay MORE attention to the experience because time went by in a flash.  Outside of the incredible honor of having a healthy baby boy, my Grandma came to the hospital to meet her great grandson.  This meant so much to me because her health was very fragile at the time and I was so grateful that she was there to share this experience with us.  It is a memory that I will cherish forever.

The last four years has been a blur.  In addition to beginning our new life as parents, we were also challenged by an incredible amount of twists, turns and tragedies.  Amidst it all came the birth of our second son, Owen, and his near death experience at the hands of a severe brain bleed.  I am so pleased to say that Owen looked that challenge right in the eyes and beat the odds by thriving and assuming the role of our living miracle and Brendan’s baby brother.  It is my incredible, beautiful family that has allowed me to keep charging ahead through some challenging times.  No matter how rough the day gets or how much trash gets flung in my face, relaxing on the couch with my wife and my two fantastic little men makes it all worthwhile.  

I always used to roll my eyes at the doting parents when they paraded around their children and shared “dull” stories about their day to day existence.  Now I have become that parent.  I take great pleasure in talking about all of the ingenious little sentiments that come out of my sons’ mouths.  It is actually hard for me to have a conversation without mentioning my kids because they are the focal point of my existence.

It is difficult for me to really convey my thoughts into words (which isn’t usually a problem for me) because thinking about my children fills me with so much joy that it is hard to concentrate.  My boys make me feel drunk with happiness.  If I could bottle it and sell it, I would be a RICH man.  In my world, the definition of joy is April, Brendan and Owen.  Who could ask for anything more?

HAPPY 4^th BIRTHDAY BRENDAN! 

Sunday mornings

Owen is a Pop Tart addict lately. That is the first thing he asks for in the morning followed by chocolate milk. (For the record, we never give him chocolate milk. All milk is chocolate milk to him.) "Cop Carts & chocit milk" as Owen call its, breakfast of champions.

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