A New Day Has Come

Yesterday proved to be really quite pointless. We arrived in the morning to find that we had yet another nurse. I think she might have been my least favorite of them all...outside of Bitch Face who I am still bitter about. We will refer to this nurse as Nurse Agatha...since she looked like an Agatha. She was a stout lady in her sixties with a strange speech impediment and a chest that lost its battle with gravity. She would meander into the room looking very clueless and when she referred to someone it would only be towards "the mother". When we first got there and sat down...we had to wait a while for Nurse Agatha to arrive. When she finally came into the room...she looked right past me where I was sitting in plain view and looked to the other side of the room behind the supply cart where April was sitting and she asked if she was the mother. Then she proceeded to talk to and respond to only April. As the day progressed...Brendan was a little unruly and April spent a great deal of time entertaining him and I devoted most of my time to tending to Owen. After Owen had his lunch (which I fed him) and the next nurse came in...Nurse Agatha started to explain what had happened throughout the day...and "his mother" fed him and he ate...blah, blah, blah...and "his mother" told me...blah, blah, blah. That was when I made the firm decision that Nurse Agatha and I were never going to be friends. Outside of her annoying me...Brendan was not in the mood for hospitals....we asked to speak to Frank and he never came to speak to us. Owen had a head ultrasound and no one gave us the results. We finally left frustrated later in the day because we really accomplished nothing and learned nothing.

Today, on the other hand, was a different story. When we arrived...Babbles was sitting at the nurses station and commented as we were entering the room..."so today is the day huh?". I replied "for real?" I said it in a joking tone...but I was serious. We have been waiting for so long for this opportunity that I think we started to just assume that we were going to just keep on waiting indefinitely. When we got into the room...we started asking the nurse on duty questions and she seemed relatively clueless and kept referring to his notes on the computer. When I asked about his head ultrasound...she asked that I come read the screen since it was a "whole paragraph". I did not understand a majority of the medical jibberish...and when I asked her to explain it to me...she said she would just go find Frank...which she did.

Frank explained that indeed Owen would be able to leave today. He had gained 100 oz. and his spitting had improved. We were going to need to continue with the 2 hour feedings until we felt more confident to increase the amount of his feedings and until Owen was keeping everything down that we were getting in. His head circumference had increased 1 cm overnight which was a major jump. I was very surprised that they were still allowing us to leave considering the circumstances...but I was not going to argue. Frank said there had also been a significant increase in the ventricles in Owen's brain...but once again...they were still proceeding with his release. He took us over to see his latest scan which as he spoke was really very unsettling to me. The blood still fills a majority of the right side of his brain. The fear reflex set it and I did not ask as many questions as I should...but the right side was very full. On the left side...there were 2 small spots where the blood has dissipated...but it dissolved that little dot of brain and in those 2 areas are now 2 small cysts. This was something brand new with this particular scan because before there had been blood in those areas. Frank went on to explain the swollen ventricle...but I wanted to know more about the cysts. When I asked them what they would mean as far as Owen's well being...he told me he did not know. Then I asked what usually happens and he repeated he did not know. If this happens in a preemie it yields very bad results...but in a full term child such as Owen...he had no idea what it meant and that would be a question for Dr.Elmo. I started to feel more uneasy...but then I realized that it made no sense to panic now....this was a happy day...so we would cross those other bridges when we came to it.

We returned back to our room and the nurse gave us his discharge papers. As I reviewed all of the facts and tests he has been through...I looked at the laundry list of appointments that have been scheduled for us in the weeks to come. While we were leaving the Madison NICU...we will still be making ample trips back and forth to Madison. We will also be getting a new pediatrician in Reedsburg for whom we will be meeting for the first time on Monday. The discharge papers explained that a shunt would still most likely be necessary...Frank explained they were still trying to hold off as long as they could because dried blood particles could clog the shunt and they wanted a majority of it would be gone first...and there is still a chance that maybe the fluid will cure itself...so lets hope so and lets hope there are no more cysts!

The process of leaving was far less eventful than I anticipated. We packed up our stuff and changed Owen into his first outfit of his very own. When we strapped him in his car seat...he looked so very small! After we left the hospital...we went out to lunch at Ella's Deli. After we ate...we fed him...and then drove home. Amazingly the bumpy car ride did not cause any spit ups!!! But Owen has never been a big cry baby...but he cried a great deal on the way home. Our suspicion was that the buckle of his car seat kept bumping him in his boy area which had just been circumcised the night before. Brendan would get annoyed every once in awhile and say "Oh Owen!"...and then pitch a small fit of his own. I think he was being competitive.

Once we got Owen into the house...we witnessed this little guy at his all time best. So far this evening he has had 3 feedings and one VERY SMALL spit up. Between his 8 and 10 pm feeding...he was wide awake and playful the entire time. He followed us with his eyes as we played with him. His hands were very busy reaching and grabbing. He was annoyed when Brendan hit his bed time and turned into the uber hyper toddler. At 10 we increased our prescribed 35 cc feeding to a 40 cc feeding and so far so good...no spits! I am not excited about the 2 hour interval feedings...but to have him home where he belongs and seemingly enjoying it thus far...I have absolutely no complaints!

Outside of the fact that Owen was released...I realize this particular entry was rather dull...but it is worth it! As I see how well he is doing tonight...I start to panic about all the things that could be yet to come. The feeding clinic...the surgeon...the physical therapists...the cysts...and the worry starts to set in. But then I was reminded that we need to stay right here in the moment. Right now our Owen is HOME! He defied the odds and he pulled through and that is nothing short of amazing. Fearing what could happen is a terrible idea because we can't control that and worrying about it now really will do nothing for us later.

Tomorrow we are planning a day at home. There are no intentions to leave the house...visit a hospital (that's Monday)...and for the first time in over 3 weeks...we will have the opportunity for April, myself and our two boys to just begin our adventure as the fab 4 and just be a family! What more could you ask for? So while this chapter comes to a close....we thank everyone again for their continued support and hope to share the little miracle that is Owen with you soon!

And while this has been a monumental day for Owen...I would like to give Brendan the opportunity to share the spotlight...

A couple nights ago...Brendan was up for pretty much the entire evening hollering at the top of his lungs. He was not feeling well as a result of his ear infection and all he wanted to do was yell. I got home from work and could hear him wailing from the bedroom. I had intended to take a half an hour or so to put music on my ipod...but April had texted me a couple of time while I was working mentioning Brendan was still fussing...so I decided to attempt to calm him down so she could have a break. When I got in the bedroom...he was still crying. Calming him down was not an easy task....and he continued to scream...so we tried to settle him in the living room. That was not working...so April decided to try to rock him in his chair. I heard him calling out "dad" so I went in and was talking to him in the dark. He asked for me...so I took him off April's lap and rocked him standing up. Finally! Some sweet silence. I rocked a bit longer and thought he might be sleeping when from the pitch dark he said "Nipples"...and a couple seconds later "Nipples" again. I am assuming he was playing off the fact that we had started giggling at him. It was kind of hard to be angry at him still after that one because he grabbed that tense moment and made it humorous. Once again...a Lee boy never fails to entertain and amuse...so stay tuned and until next time...Good Night!